Author: Marci Stevens

We USED to Hold Hands

 

164952396-2Twelve years ago, I was dating this guy Phil. Man, he was hot!! He was short and stocky. Thick, thick thighs and big, beefy arms. The kind of arms you just wanted to be wrapped up in. That kind of thick, muscular chest that you knew would always make you feel safe. Phil and I were as thick as thieves. We did everything together. We rode bikes, went out to eat, went shopping, went to the movies, went dancing, visited each other at school or at work – just everything. And talk. We could talk about anything and we did. We talked about religion, money, kids, our parents, our family, and how we were raised. We would talk about potholes if it came up. We did not always agree but we enjoyed talking to each other nonetheless.

Then, we got married. And no, the story doesn’t change here. No dramatic Dun- Dun Duuuuun music here. We still did mostly all of the same things together that we did when we dated. We would even sit on the same side of a restaurant booth so that we could – guess what? Hold hands!! Yes, I know. We were in love. So in love. I could not wait to hear his car pull in the driveway, as he would return from work. We purchased a chair and a half (that’s fancy for a big chair – big chairroom for 2) so that we could sit with each other in the living room while we watched TV. I hated to be away from Phil. My heart was just so connected to that man. He was charming, tenderhearted, compassionate and so funny! Man, we really made each other laugh all the time.

Fast forward twelve years. Continue reading

About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.

Hello? A Little Help Please!: Unmet Expectations Can Poison Your Mood

roadtriphellIt was going to be a busy day.  My family had lots of places to go, things to do and places to be: all back- to- back.  We had 2 parties to get to (to which I had no gift for either), we had to grab lunch on the go and travel with a 3 year old and a 13 year old. So you can imagine that with potty breaks, teen boredom, complaints and whining, things can get pretty hairy!

Our first destination: gift for first party.

I tell my husband that I’m heading to the gift aisle.  He stays with kids.  We will meet in the front of the store.  I only have to get 1 item.  I hastily get what I need, check out and am waiting in the front of store.  Where are they?  What is taking them so long?  Seriously!?  Frustration building.  I actually have time to fill out the card (really fill it out), I have time to bag AND tissue the present. Where is he?  What are they doing?  Finally, I just call him.  Come on!! Lets go!  We don’t have all day! FYI – they were shopping, havin’ a ball! Continue reading

About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.

A Hug is Not Just a Hug to Him: More Love Language Advice


I know what makes him tick.

kasanieI know what makes him feel special and needed and desired and loved.  I KNOW these things.  Why can’t I just do them?  I have known about this struggle of mine for a while now.  Years even.  My husband likes affection.  No, I don’t just mean sex.  I know he likes that. He needs a hug, a touch on the shoulder, my hand on his hand, a kiss on his head as I pass by him.  Why can’t I do that for him?  It’s so simple, right?  Ugh.  Is there something wrong with me?  I don’t have any repressed issues from my past nor am I dealing with any issues that I am aware of.  Am I just not wired that way?  Maybe.  But that’s not really the issue.  What’s important is that my husband IS wired that way.  He likes affection.  He feels strong, masculine and cared for by his woman when he receives that kind of love expression from me. It fills his love tank. If you haven’t yet read The 5 Love Languages then you need to. You and your spouse should go online and take the test. It’s free and it makes a huge difference in your marriage.

The book explains very clearly how we each give and receive love.  5LLcover-128Chances are, you aren’t wired the same way that your spouse is.  Surprise! This makes communication and seeing eye to eye kind of tough.  My primary love language is service. When my husband does things for me out of the kindness of his heart I feel loved.  When I come home from work and the dishes are done and the counter is cleaned off  – I feel loved.  Appreciated.  When the laundry basket is not sitting in the middle of the living room floor where I left it, I feel loved, BONUS love is when the laundry is put away!  BAM!  When my husband puts gas in my car if he drives it, I feel loved.  Service. Continue reading

About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.

Ken Coleman Live!

phil blue sincere laugh 2Phil Stevens, Creator of Pressure Points, will be featured TONIGHT on The Ken Coleman Show. Don’t miss this! From 6:30-6:45 PM.  My husband has a heart for healthy marriages and puts his marriage second in his life – allowing God to be first.

Tune in to hear why I love my husband and share Pressure Points!  Your marriage IS worth saving.  Follow this link http://kencolemanshow.com/live

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About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.

From the Heart

phil blue sincere laugh 2

Pressure Points  is a ministry that is near and dear to the hearts of both myself and my husband, Phil.  God placed on Phil’s big & giving heart a passion and compassion for healthy marriagesPressure Points is meant to encourage you, as a married couple, to fight for the health of your marriage.  Don’t dismay, be uplifted.  God provides you with the tools to make it work, you just have to use them.  Honesty, respect, encouragement, loyalty, love and so much more.

This ministry depends on your support.  A tiny donation goes a long way.  I encourage my husband to pour into what he believes in.  I implore you also to donate to Pressure Points if a video or blog touches you.  We hear from you often, your stories of how these short films resonate with you or have spoken truth to someone you know and love.

Keep watching.

Keep sharing.

Support the ministry.

If we reach just one couple that needs change, then it is ALL worth it.

You are loved.

-Marci

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About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.

Hurry Up, Will You?


**Disclaimer: When I write “friend”, ” friends”  or “another couple” I may or may not be referring to myself  or my myself and my husband.**

There is this couple that my husband and I enjoy spending time with (wink wink). My friend confides in me that often times there is an issue that is so pressing for her, heavy on her heart, that she really wants & needs to discuss it with her spouse immediately.woman-thinking 3 So… (my friend) figures everything out for him and lays it on him! Wow! What a great wife!  She has thought about it, considered all aspects and as she shares with her spouse. Heck, she even has the perfect solution. Genius. So kind of her.

Well, so unexpected to my friend, after sharing with her spouse this “topic” that needed to be discussed – well her spouse was not at the same excitement level that she was on the topic.  She was at about a level 10 (10 being the highest level) and she shared her topic with passion.  However, as her husband listened to the information given he was just at about a level… well maybe a 2. Ok maybe a 3.

Continue reading

About Marci Stevens

Marci is a wife, mother, speaker and blogger. She is also a co-founder of a powerful non-profit, award-winning marriage ministry, Marriage Pressure Points. Marci writes about her own struggles as a wife in hopes that God will continue to offer her grace and use her testimony to help others.