Oh wait. Let me back up.
What is a love language? The 5 Love Languages refers to your emotional communication preference. It singles out your primary love language, what it means, and how you can use it to connect with your loved one with intimacy and fulfillment.
I happen to do a bunch of ‘stuff‘. I thankfully get great encouragement from some amazing people that drives me to do more. However, the crazy thing is, I’m always waiting for that ONE person to affirm my performance, service, accomplishment, etc. One thousand people can tell me “Good job. That was amazing Phil!!!” And I’m always very grateful. But there’s always a tiny empty spot in my heart for that one special person to say “Job well done”. You may think it’s God, but His affirmation is unique to me. It’s just different, but very, very fulfilling. On the human side, it’s my wife. My companion. My team mate. My cheerleader. My biggest fan. I need her to say in whatever words she does, “Good job babe. You did it. I am proud of you.” EVERYTHING is right with the world. It charges me up!
It’s a big task for her, and it doesn’t come naturally. However, it fills my love tank. It blesses me. It sincerely shows me that she cares, pays attention, appreciates me and believes in me. Selfishly, I sometimes wish the affirmation will just spout out of her mouth on a regular basis, but that’s an unfair expectation for me to have of her. If this style of communication isn’t natural for her, I need to swallow my pride, open my mouth and ask her what she thinks of _____. She’ll tell me. Funny thing is, she’s always more than happy to and it feels good.
I encourage you and your spouse to read The 5 Love Languages together and know your spouses love language. If you love them, you will learn it and you will make an honest attempt to speak it. Ultimately, their joy and happiness should come from God first, but as their spouse and companion, your marriage will surely flourish if you know what love language speaks to their heart.
Wanna know YOUR love language? Take this test. Heck, encourage your spouse to take it to. Couldn’t hurt. Might help.
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